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10.24.2013

CM: one day I'll poop in private

My newest piece from Connected Mom... a little embarrassing!! 

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Gwen is going through a want to be with one of us at all times phase right now. While just a few weeks ago she would happily wander throughout our downstairs, grabbing a toy from her play kitchen (in our real kitchen) before grabbing a coloring book from the living room, then flopping down on the floor in the dining room to color, now she seems to be developing some fears of being alone* and consequently wants us to go with her anytime she needs something from another room. It also means that she wants to follow us when we go to other rooms, including the bathroom.

We are pretty open in our household when it comes to nudity, and bodily functions. Gwen will take showers with me on the weekends, we change in front of each other, and we often leave the door open when we go to the bathroom. Its just not a big deal. But suddenly my normally quiet "nature calls" times, have become together times with a chatty girl standing by my knee. Its been interesting. I'm all about attachment, but this isn't exactly what I pictured.

The thing is, I don't want to force her out of the room. While I don't quite understand her newly developed fears of our safe home during the light of day, they are still very real to her, and I want to respect that. While I miss her independence, I know it will return and even more so then before. We've had some talks about how she is safe here, how Mama is always nearby and can hear if she needs help, and that she can go from room to room without us, but I know this will take time.

For now we're going day-by-day, and finding the balance of making Gwen feel secure and safe, while still enforcing some personal space during more private moments (we picked a floor tile in the bathroom a safe distance away, and she stands there!). And I know that soon enough I'll get to poop in private again.


Did any of your kids go through a scared phase? What did you find that helped?





* though thankfully not in the comfort of her own bed at night  ::knocks on wood::

3 comments:

  1. Oh I can totally relate to this! My daughter insists on coming into the bathroom with me too. I can't remember the last time I was in there alone... I don't think it's because she's scared though--maybe just because she doesn't want me out of her sight? Unfortunately, I don't have any solutions... Just hoping it's a phase she'll get over soon!

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  2. Oh my, my niece is going through that stage and driving her parents insane. With her there doesn't seem to be a fear element, it's just that she wants to be talking to someone constantly.

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  3. Lol. I can relate. I can't go to the bathroom without hearing "mama, mama, mama, mama, maaaama" and seeing little hands under the door followed by whining because the little hands got stuck.

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