Though the title is not permanent, I had a moment the other week when it actually dawned on me that I'm now a stay-at-home Mom/Wife. Gwen's Kindergarten is only half-day, so the other half of the day we are together. I'm doing 95% of the cooking, cleaning, washing, straightening. Its a role that is lovely and odd.
I've worked in some job or another since I was 17. Stable hand, babysitter, teacher in the baby room of a daycare, Home Health Aide, Mother's Helper, Librarian's assistant, Intern, Student Aide, Program Coordinator, and Director of Membership. Fifteen years of bringing in my own money, and having a regular role outside of the house. To say that this new role, with its new routines, is sometimes trying would be an understatement.
Its not to say I hadn't daydreamed about this exact role, but in those daydreams school was always full day, and I had many more hours to myself!
A contributing factor, I'm sure, is the fact that I'm such a night owl. I try to be good and go to bed at 10, but without next day's work hanging over me, well night after night I find myself staying up too late. Morning comes too quickly and I'm a tired girl, yet the next night I do it again. There's just something about the peaceful, quiet night that makes me remember every little thing I meant to do earlier. I want to read more, play more, just sit and be more.
This is not to say that I'm complaining about my current lot. I feel so blessed that we were able to make this leap, that I am able to be there for Gwen so much during such a big transition, and that I get to pursue my dream jobs while Trav works one that he absolutely LOVES.
I'm just really not good at cleaning.... trade-offs. :-)