Inspiration in Random Places

“𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐚𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐝.”

― 𝐍𝐢𝐤𝐢𝐭𝐚 𝐆𝐢𝐥𝐥

"To be left alone on the tightrope of youthful unknowing is to experience the excruciating beauty of full freedom and the threat of eternal indecision. Few, if any, survive their teens. Most surrender to the vague but murderous pressure of adult conformity. It becomes easier to die and avoid conflicts than to maintain a constant battle with the superior forces of maturity.

[...] Mother whispered, "See, you don't have to think about doing the right thing. If you're for the right thing, then you do it without thinking."'

-- Maya Angelou, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings 

"She thanks the sky, and she walks the earth,
Her tears that fall are beautiful.
She says my people, she says my tribe,
all good lovers out there, peace tonight, peace tonight.

To the broken hearted, the burdened too,
To everyone, peace tonight, peace tonight."

-- Elephant Revival, Peace Tonight

Like, okay sugar and booze feel good, then bad Sometimes real bad But art feels bad before it feels even worse

 – Tommy Pico, Junk


Camping and Summer and Stars [Just Write]

I have new hand soap that is infused with wild orange blossom honey, and it smells like a wildflower field on a bright spring day - warm, fragrant, and full of life. It makes me ache for the balmy months ahead. Gwen and I are both chomping at the bit to get into the tent and do some camping.

I have this memory that pops up now whenever I think of camping, and it still takes my breath away. We were sleeping in our tent, all three of us for once, and we woke in the middle of the night because Gwen had to go to the bathroom. We decided to all walk over to the little bath house. On our way back I looked up and literally stopped dead in my tracks. Up in the mountains, away from all the light pollution that unfortunately blankets our area, with the most perfectly crisp, clear skies, there were stars. Not just a few stars across the sky like we normally see, but a blanket of stars so thick, glowing, and numerous that it covered us all.

The more I looked, the more stars appeared, too many to count - so expansive that it made me feel small, but in the best possible way. Galaxy upon galaxy existed above me in that moment, in a way that felt more real then it had before; and I was struck mute. Trav and Gwen had already made it back to the tent at this point, so I lingered only a few more moments, but those moments were filled with the fullness of the universe.


Horsing Around

Gwen has talked about wanting to ride horses for a while now. She was so excited by them, and would talk about it often when we drove by the stable just a few miles from our place. She finally got her wish this past weekend, thanks to a birthday gift from her Nonnie and Papa!

The morning was colder then we would have liked, but Gwen loved it and did so well! We ended up buying the 10 pack of lessons, so she'll have that as a regular activity this Spring and Summer.

I always loved horses, so its fun seeing Gwen come to that too. Hopefully we'll be able to get in some family trail rides this summer!


Examples and Little Changes

I've written before about how the end of December - beginning of January kind of sucked.

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Well, as written above, I've decided to really do something about it. More consistency, including Gwen in the process.

Other little steps I'm taking? Well I started keeping a weekly paper calendar. Taking the time on Sunday to look at the week ahead and break down "to do"s into smaller chunks makes everything seem less rushed, and less hectic. I also bought myself a cute glass water bottle which I've been filling up every morning and making sure I drink at least that amount of plain water by the end of the day, in addition to whatever else I drink (morning matcha and afternoon Moringa Infusions for the win!). I'm also continuing with my weekly self care baths. I can still get things done, but I also get to relax and treat my body (extra nice since I do it on a lifting day).

What healthy changes are you making in your life?


Continued Training - Doula Addition

Last weekend I spent all of Saturday (8am-5pm) at a local midwifery center, which hosted an amazing training on When Survivors Give Birth. The unfortunate truth is that sexual assault will effect a jarring amount of people during their life, and that birth can be greatly effected by those experiences. It was an intense day, but so important with such valuable information.

I'm always looking for ways to make my practice more conscientious to all who may find their way to me. This training was definitely an important one.  

Photo from Rise Up Midwife, a really amazing group looking to lift up Doulas and Midwives of Color, as well as Indigenous. They are doing important work in two communities that face a disproportionate amount of complications and dismissal in birth. 


St. David's Day!

Friday was St. David's Day (basically the Welsh equivalent of St. Paddy's Day). You know me, my favorite way to celebrate anything is with food, and that's what I did.

I started with Welsh Rarebit in the morning...

Then ended the day by making my first batch of Welsh Cookies!

It's quite the arm workout, and I wish I had an actual griddle to cook them on (it would have gone so much faster!)... but for my freshman effort, I'm very pleased!

I'm proudly Celtic year round, but love really showing it off on March 1st. 


Breakfast Light

Winter is a whole different beast, when the light is long, low, less effective. But the rest of the year, the slow rise of the sun over the buildings warms me and wakes me and smells green and yellow, like grass and dried corn. Its breezes like butterfly wings flapping, and feels like a pause.

I have time to savor food, not just breakfast fare like sausage link and bagels, but anything that calls to me. Round, ripe blueberries are some of my favorite... plump to bursting, like fragrant bubbles. Or savory, salty ramen; hot and filling and comforting in a way a piece of toast will never be. Matcha, fresh and earthy, rounds out whatever I'm eating.

I wrote this years ago, and Colorado no longer feels unfamiliar, but its somehow still fitting. 

"3.5 months ago we got in our cars and started driving. We drove away from our house, from our state, from life as we knew it. We drove and drove and drove. Some days here feel so normal and boring, but most days it still feels like we are covering endless miles not knowing exactly what to expect next. It's a fun adventure, but it's also tiring. There are times like tonight that I want to go back to familiar PA, spread out a blanket, lay on the ground, and feel rooted again. Instead I'll go to sleep and hoped for a day of grounding connectedness tomorrow."

The morning, after Gwen is in school and Trav is at work, before I really have to rush into the day is the time when I feel most rooted, most at peace. Rolling flavors around my mouth, feeling warm sun, cool breezes, my mind can still and I feel connected to something bigger.

Lunch is often rushed, and dinner is a family affair, but breakfast... breakfast is my time.


I write this in winter, when its too cold to eat on the porch, my favorite breakfast spot. But I'm counting down to warmer days, getting excited about the extra light that's sticking around in the evening. Imbolc, the halfway point between Yule and Ostara, was a month ago, the countdown is well on. I can't wait to celebrate the new season with our traditional meal, as well as my own morning ritual renewed.


Busy Days

Lots of busy days lately. I'm taking little steps to help me feel more organized, and less stressed about all that life has coming at us. Sometimes I write yoga classes and take phone calls in the tub...

I got a really beautiful weekly planner, and I've been taking a few minutes on Sunday night or Monday morning to look at the week ahead and write out all of the things I have planned: classes, meetings, trainings, Gwen's activities, as well as special chores and errands like taking the recycling, writing classes, and appointments.

Just taking the time to look ahead and break it all down into manageable bites makes everything feel so much easier. I'm also slowly working through different areas of the apartment, organizing and sorting, cutting down on the clutter around me.

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Taking time for me, with getting my hair done and taking yoga classes, are really important parts of making the busy times feel less overwhelming.

And special dates with Trav help too. We recently attended a Lehigh U alumni event at a pretty fascinating museum that we hadn't checked out before.

I've been busy behind the scenes too, working on some very exciting upcoming events... things that I've been dreaming about! I can't share them all yet, but I can share this!: 

I'd love to see you there!

What's keeping you busy lately? What's keeping you organized and sane during the busy times?