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3.11.2014

Not a Bang, but a Whisper {Carnival of Natural Parenting}

Welcome to the March 2014 Carnival of Natural Parenting: Everyday Superheroes
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have talked about the remarkable people and characteristics that have touched their lives. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

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If you talk to my daughter, Gwen, about superheros, then you will hear about good guys who fight bad guys and keep them from hurting people. There will be fighting, and muscles. And there will definitely be costumes.

I think that's what pops into a lot of people's minds when they hear superhero.

Lately though, my talks with my daughter have started to try to mold that image into something broader, something bigger, something much more realistic. I want her to keep those superhero fantasies. I want her to believe in magic for as long as possible. But I want her to know about other kinds of heroes as well.

For me, heroes come in many sizes. It is the soldier, the policeman, the fireman putting their life on the line for us every day. These guys seem big. They are easy to spot. There are others though, that are even "smaller," less conspicuous. I want my daughter to know that bravery is standing up for what you believe in, for what's right, even when others don't like it. Its working hard to live a good life and provide a good life for your family. Its defending or befriending those who need it, even if its just offering them a seat at the lunch table.

We all want to make a difference. Its something that I've been working on/towards, something that motivates me as I work to share my life. The key is remembering that it doesn't have to look like giant acts of heroism that end up on the 10 o'clock news. Often its the little acts of bravery that add up to have big results.

Gwen is already brave. She rides rollercoasters with her hands thrown in the air, and takes medicine she doesn't like, and lets the doctor give her a shot. By talking to her about the different ways there are to be a hero, I hope she'll continue to be brave, if that means speaking up for someone being picked on or not letting anyone pressure her into doing something she knows is wrong. I hope that she'll have the same respect for the single mom working two jobs to care for her family as she does for the superheros we see in movies.

Heroism is often times about whispers instead of bangs, but if enough of us whisper, together we can fill the indifferent silence.


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Carnival of Natural Parenting -- Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama
Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
  • I Am A Super Hero — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama shares how she learned the hard way exactly what it means to be a real super hero and not a burned out shell of a human simply pretending to be one.
  • Quiet Heroics — Heroism doesn't have to be big and bold. Read how Jorje of Momma Jorje is a quiet hero…and how you probably are, too.
  • Not a Bang, but a Whisper {Carnival of Natural Parenting} — Meegs at A New Day talks about the different types of "superheroes," ones that come in with a bang and ones that come in with a whisper.
  • Silent courage of motherhood in rural Cambodia — Nathalie at Kampuchea Crossings marvels at how rural Khmer women defy the odds in childbirth.
  • Super PappyMother Goutte's little boy met a superhero in checked slippers and Volkswagen Polo, his grand dad: Super Pappy!
  • An Open Letter to Batman — Kati at The Best Things challenges Batman to hold up his end of the deal, in the name of social justice, civic duty, and a little boy named Babe-O!
  • My Village — Kellie at Our Mindful Life reflects on the people who helped her to become her best self.
  • 5 Lessons My Kids Taught Me — Children are amazing teachers, when we only stop to listen. They remind us to choose happiness, to delight in the small things, to let go and forgive. There is so much we can learn from our children. Justine at The Lone Home Ranger shares a few of the lessons she's learned.
  • Could you use some superpowers? — Tat at Mum in search shares a fun activity to help you connect with your own superpowers.
  • Like Fire Engines — Tam at tinsenpup tells the story of the day she saw a surprising superhero lurking in the guise of her not entirely mild-mannered four-year-old daughter.
  • Everyday Superheroes — Erica at ChildOrganics shares her list of Walker Warburg Syndrome Superheroes that have touched her life forever.
  • My Superhero of the Week: Nancy GallagherTribal Mama muses about the transcendent things her superhero mom has done.
  • My choice in natural birth does not make me a super hero — Bianca, The Pierogie Mama, discusses her thoughts on her experience with the perception of natural birth and putting those mamas on a different level. Does giving birth naturally give cause for an extra pat on the back? No! All mamas, no matter how they birth, are superheroes.
  • Someone's Hero — Sometimes being a parent means pretending to be a grown-up, but it always means you are someone's hero. Read Mandy's lament at Living Peacefully with Children.
  • Growing into a Super Hero — Casey at Joyful Courage shares how owning our behavior and choosing to be a better parent, a better person, is an act of courage.
  • A Math Superhero — Kerry at City Kids Homeschooling writes that her 7-year-old daughter's superhero is an MIT-trained mathematician.
  • It Starts With Truffula Trees And Tulips — Luschka of Diary of a First Child takes a hard look at the realities of her relationship with her mother, and through this post goes on a journey of discovery that ends in a surprise realisation for her.
  • We Don't Need an Excuse — Maria Kang (aka "Hot Mom") asks women #WhatsYourExcuse for not being in shape? Dionna at Code Name: Mama asks Hot Mom what her excuse is for not devoting her life to charity work, or fostering dozens of stray dogs each year, or advocating for the needs of others. Better yet, Code Name: Mama says, how about we realize that every woman has her own priorities. Focus on your own, and stop judging others for theirs.
  • It's not heroic when you're living it — Lauren at Hobo Mama knows from the inside that homeschooling does not take a hero, and that much of what we choose as parents is simply what works best for us.
  • Superheroes, princesses and preschoolers — Garry at Postilius discusses why his preschool-age son is not ready for comic book superheroes.
  • The Loving Parents of Children with Special Needs – Everyday Superheroes — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now shares posts with resources for parents of children with special needs along with posts to help others know how to support parents of children with special needs.
  • Everyday Empathy — Mommy Giraffe of Little Green Giraffe shares why her secret superpower is everyday empathy.
  • The Simplicity of Being a Superhero — Ana at Panda & Ananaso explains what superheroes mean to her wise three-year-old.
  • My Father, The Hero — Fathers are pretty amazing; find out why Christine at The Erudite Mom thinks hers is the bees knees.

5 comments:

  1. The little things matter just as much as the bigger stuff. I love how you encourage the small gestures while keeping her on track to be able to make a stand for the bigger things later :-)

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  2. I like very much what you're saying about your daughter being brave, particularly the rollercoaster rides with hands thrown in the air :) I, too, think that it's very brave!

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  3. Beautiful! And so true. I hope my children also see the heroism in the small and often unsung things.

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  4. I love the thought of pointing out how our kids are brave. I see things and have probably said they were kind or nice, but I like "brave."

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  5. Well, you win the Carnival best quote award with that last one! "Heroism is often times about whispers instead of bangs, but if enough of us whisper, together we can fill the indifferent silence." I totally agree. I try to help my daughter see everyone as a potential superhero while she grows into her own version of one as well.

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