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6.03.2009

dreaming big and what if

I've had two friends come to me recently with big dreams that haven't found their match in real life. I, gentle readers, am an expert in this arena. I'm such a dreamer, a look-aheader, a next big thing girl. I'm always saying that things will be awesome when xyz. But it gets to you sometimes, as my two friends are finding, when the dreams you've had don't match the reality of your current situation. One friend is finding that her job is leaving her unfulfilled, and that the promise of what it could have been is going to need major supplementing. Another friend is finding that her marriage is harder then it ever has been before and she's measuring out what she imagined it would be vs. what it is vs. what else could be.

Yet another friend has been stuck in cycle of saying, "it will be better when..." So stuck there, in fact, that he forgot to see where he was right then and almost lost his marriage in the process. He's learning to embrace the day a bit more and see what he has, not just what will be.

It all really got me thinking about the reality of day to day vs. the dreams we carry for ourselves. My dreams and my reality are so divergent in some ways, yet pretty spot on in others. Its hard not to imagine that everything could be so perfect if only I could just change "this." You find yourself asking, Is this all there is? Would it be so much better to leave this behind, or is this really as good as it gets? If I stick it out will I find that perfection I'm looking for, or will I be missing the opportunity for something even better?

Ironically, for me, the fact that these friend's approached me with their what ifs, made mine fade away just a bit. When you are looking at the parts of your life that don't add up, its easy to imagine that everyone else is happier or more fulfilled then you are... but the fact is, we all have these question, we all have these doubts, and we all have a part of our life that could use some improvement. And just because I have these thoughts as well doesn't mean that my life, my marriage, my job isn't good... or isn't where I am supposed to be.

Ahh, perspective.

What do you do when you have your moments of "my life isn't supposed to be like this?!"?

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